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Archive for May, 2009

Exactly one year ago today, in Wisconsin Dells (the self-proclaimed “Water Park Capital of the World”), a little pooch was born. There was no room in the bed, so his mom had to give birth to him in a manger. 3 wise dogs brought him gifts of pepperoni, rawhide, and Wii cords. There was a bright star up in the sky – but then it turned out to be an airplane.

Ok, so I made that whole thing up. Except the part where I was born. Today is my birthday! Can you believe it???? I’m 1 year old today. Funny: it seems more like 7 years. Hmmmmmm…

Anyways, I’ve got a pretty damn good life. Two wonderful alphas who love me, a warm kennel whenever I need it, food in the dish, a nice little perch on the couch for window watching and sun bathing, plenty of toys, a yard full of dirt to dig and roll in, washcloth baths every morning, a big hallway to run down, and a clean bill of health. Yup, my life is pretty good. I’m so happy to have been born!

Me when I was born:

 

Sleeping... something you never grow out of!

Sleeping... something you never grow out of

 

And now…

 

I guess you don't grow out of happiness either!

I guess you don't grow out of happiness either!

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Yeah, North Dakota. You know, one state to the left of MN… really? No, I’m not making it up! It’s right about South Dakota; right below Canada. What? Seriously! Whatever – look at a map.

Anyways, male alpha male and I took the loooooooong ride out to Bismarck, ND – also known as “The Jewel of the Part of the United States Everyone Forgets is There.” It was a surprise visit to see the female alpha male, who was hanging out with her family and didn’t think she’d see us for a few more days. I can’t yell “Surprise!”, so I licked her face. Same thing, right? =)

On the way to North Dakota: The torn-open envelope shaped state.

On the way to North Dakota: The torn-open envelope shaped state.

Right now, the house is getting cleaned for a baby shower tomorrow so I’m chillin’ in the basement. Literally – it’s COLD down here. But I’ve got a nice warm lap to sit in, so it’s all good for me.

When I get back home, I’ve got some AWESOME (or “PAWSOME” as some of my doggy friends like to say) Imdoginations all ready to go. Bet you can’t wait. Well, you’ll have to!

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So check it out: male alpha male took me to his work the other day for something super cool. A doggie photo shoot! Turns out, they’re making some ads for a place called Woody’s Pet Food Deli and needed a few good lookin’ pooches as models. I mean, seriously – who else would you call when you need a good lookin’ pooch??

I practiced a few of my poses and looks at home before the shoot: The Pant. The Puppy Eye. The Friendly Pup. The Scholarly Pooch. The Lazy Susan. Things were looking good. But when I got there, there were like 3 other dogs and I got super excited… and I pooped. NOOOOOOOOOOOOO! I got stage fright! Would this ruin my chance of being famous?? Would this crush my dreams of money, success, and moist delicious dog food eaten out of a crystal dish???

Nope! I got in there and popped a few good poses off before getting distracted by a rope toy. My male alpha male said I coulda behaved a little better, but you can’t expect me to hold still when there’s dogs and toys around that need playin’ with!

Here’s a few shots from the shoot. I can’t wait to see the final ad – Paul says it’s awesome and that I look AMAZING! Nothing new, right? =)

 

Lola and I getting ready for the shoot. You know, doing typical model stuff.

Lola and I getting ready for the shoot. You know, doing typical model stuff.

 

 

Hitch was there too. That guy's tongue cracked me up!

Hitch was there too. That guy's tongue cracked me up!

 

 

Moments before "the accident"

Moments before "the accident"

 

 

98% of modeling is facing the right way!

98% of modeling is facing the right way.

 

 

Me and Cory, the photographer. He's doing what he loves to do, and I'm doing what I love to do: chew!

Me and Cory, the photographer. He's doing what he loves to do, and I'm doing what I love to do: chew!

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Dogs like to chew on bones. Skeletons are made of bones. That’s probably why you don’t see any skeletons with pet dogs…

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Even fiercely independent pooches like myself have mothers. And I love mine very much. Thanks, mom, for 8 weeks of puppy suckling and little nudges with your cold nose.

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To all you pooches out there: Don’t forget where you came from. And to all those puppy mothers who haven’t gotten a phone call from their puppies in a while… I accidentally chewed up my own cellphone. Whoops!

Love you, Mom!

Also… to my mom away from mom – my female alpha male: your face always tastes like love. If it wasn’t for you, I’d be half the dog I am (probably the “ket” part… that half tends to misbehave way more than the “Bis” part).

I love you too!

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No, not that way! This way:

bisket terminated

Forget T1, T2 and T3. I’m the TP – TERMINATOR PUPPY! Now tell me where John Connor is or I’ll rip off your arms destroy you crush your skull TERMIN-eat all your Kraft singles!

 

Puppies: click here.

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Today marks the 21st people birthday and 147th doggie birthday of this dog. Oh my flippin’ Great Dane in heaven, that is an old dog!! I can’t even imagine being that old. But once I am (and mark my words, I WILL BE), and my little Bisket parts don’t work as well as they used to, I’m gonna make sure I have one of those little Barbie cars to drive myself around the house (see exhibit A).

Regardless, salud and big woofs to you, old doggie!

 

EXHIBIT A: This is me in like 20 years.

EXHIBIT A: This is me in like 20 years.

 

 

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