Guess what?! No, I’m not eating a bean burrito right now. No, I’m not coming over for Thanksgiving. No, my testicles are NOT growing back. Ok, stop guessing! I’ll just tell you.
Tomorrow I’m going to be a brother!
No, not a Shaft kinda brother – a real brother kinda brother. That’s cuz tomorrow night the alphas are bringing home a little girl puppy to keep me company.
Am I scared? No. Am I worried about her eating my food? Yes. Is it frowned upon by law to fall in love with your adopted sister? Yes, probably. Will I do it anyways? That makes 3 yeses.
But here’s the thing: lately I’ve been bored out of my mind! It’s like 6 bazillion below outside which means I don’t go for walks as much and playing outside is pretty hard on my little fraws. (You know, frozen paws – fraws. I thought everyone called them that…)
So I lay around. I bark at the fireplace. I suckle on Mittens. I solve an algorithm. I lay down again. And it’s like 11:30 am. Being bored is so… boring!
Now, I’m gonna have a little sweetie to act all crazy with – and I couldn’t be happier. I’m gonna teach her all the best places to poop, how to do imdoginations and how to make it look like you are sad when all you really want is cheese. Then we’ll run around like crazy dogs and do that move where we jump on the couch, then off the couch, then on the couch, then off the couch, then on the couch, then off the couch, then on the couch, then off the couch, then down the hallway. Life, my friends, will be oh so good!