Check it.

Here’s a rap I wrote about my upcoming neutering (Set to the beat of The Fresh Prince of Bel Air theme song):
 
Now this is a story all about how
My little ball’s comin’ off without a sound.
It’ll only take a minute don’t make  fuss
And I’ll tell you why I’ll be a dog with no nuts.
In South [...]

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I was thinking today…

If my paws were made of salami, would I eat them??
Without a doubt. For sure. Absolutely.
You’re asking: “You would eat your own paws?!?! What kind of animal are you?!!” And I answer: “Yes.” and “A dog. Duh.”
Let me put it this way – when you’re a pooch, you’ve got to get anything you can. Sure, [...]

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Life isn’t always fair (cont’d)

As you read in my last post, I got some sad news yesterday. One of my very dear friends is to be executed on February 10th – that’s right, I said EXECUTED. For it is on this day that my last remaining testicle shall be removed unceremoniously from my body. (The other one came out [...]

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Life isn’t always fair

I’ve just received some disconcerting news: I will soon be separated from an old friend. Details soon…
 

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Nominations!

 
 
I love movies! By my count, I’ve watched over 1,145 movies in the 7 months of my life. Of course that’s counting the 1,144 times I’ve watched Turner and Hooch and the one time I watched the Estelle Getty/Sylvester Stallone masterpiece Stop! Or my mom will shoot (hey, it was on TNT). Anyways, that pretty much [...]

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Photos of me thinking about food

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

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“Small dog” playtime

Sunday was an awesome day for one reason: small dog playtime.
Now don’t let the “small dog” title fool you – because us small dogs are a force to be reckoned with. Had all 20 of us “little” pooches sat down and come up with a plan to overthrow the alphas, we could’ve easily overtaken them, [...]

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Back!

RAR! And greetings, loyal readers! (People, pets, and young children who should be sleeping right now but instead have stashed deceiving pillows under their blankets and snuck out of bed for a late-night read of this spectacular blog)
As you’ve probably noticed, I’ve been laying low the past few days – all while doing NO LOW-LAYING [...]

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Imdoginations

Sort of like impersonations, but for dogs. Anyways, I do quite a few of them and I’d like to share some with you. So, here begins another Bisket exclusive column.
I give you… Imdoginations!
 
First up: Arnold Schwarzenegger in The Terminator

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Timothy Treadwell in Grizzly Man:

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
And finally, Gizmo from the hit movie Gremlins:

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Pretty good, eh?? Let me know [...]

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The KOOSH and I broke up. It didn’t want a commitment, and I thought it was stupid to be in love with a ball made of rubber filaments attached to a soft core that was last popular in 1988.
Plus, why chew on rubber when you can chew on…

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